Woke up at 530 this morning to the sound of Bob vomiting. Exactly as they said it would happen. Dr. M told us that by the end of this week he will have the nausea, vomiting, hair loss and diarrhea. He’s tried very hard to fight the mouth sores by rinsing his mouth out with a baking soda and water solution.
It is all expected but that doesn’t mean it’s easy to accept. I don’t think I’m scared anymore -thank you God! There are brief moments of uneasiness that may be the beginnings of fear…but I’m praying it away as quickly as it comes. Last night Bob’s parents visited and his mom was asking some questions about cancer and it’s causes and treatments … And the fact that doctors don’t have a cure yet….blah blah blah. Does that stem from fear too? The questions? And the reliance on the doctors to cure him — even though they’ve said repeatedly that there is no cure, just a chance at remission. Fear sucks. Even when I just see it on someone else.
But my hope, my faith, my trust is not in a drug or a doctor. My faith is in God and His holy word. I will continue to look to Him for the answers, because he’s got them.
My dear friend Cindy Hope used to say, “No matter how grey it looks, there is always a patch of blue. So look up and see the patch of blue.” This morning I saw a post on Facebook that wasn’t TO me but FOR me. It said — HERE’S YOUR DOSE OF BLUE SKY. I think sometimes we just need to look for it. Seek and you will find.