My mom always says “whatever doesn’t kill you makes you stronger”.  I know that this fight is not killing me, but I sure don’t feel stronger.   I feel weaker.
The bible says that HIS strength is made perfect in our weakness.    I feel weak…so His strength must be being made perfect.  I rest only in knowing that HE is strong, and that His strength is what is holding me up.  This fight is pushing me back into Him, into His strength.  I feel so weak, so small.  Thank you God that you are so big, and that You’ve called me back into this place.  I won’t run away from you, I will be vulnerable to You.  I can’t hide from what is happening…but I can hide in You.  Under the shadow of Your wings I will find rest, I will find strength to go on.  Those who wait upon the Lord will renew their strength.  I will wait.  Maybe not so patiently or gracefully…but I will wait.  I will wait on God to move, again.   He will.