Winter provision

Woke up thinking (admittedly…worrying) about work / business / money.  So I reached up and grabbed the corner of the Talit that hangs on my headboard.  I cover my head with it and start to pray.  “God take away this worry, take away this fear.  Why am I so confident that cancer is beaten in our family, that Bob & mom will not die but live and declare the works of the Lord…but then freak out about our provision?” 

Seriously, am I less concerned about the fight with cancer in my mom/my husband than with the financial status of our company right now?  Not logical. 

When your faith gets raised up in one area…are you vulnerable in another?

I hear the word ‘covenant’ in my head.  I sit up and start looking through my bible…is the tithe a covenant promise between me and God?  We tithe, we give, we plant financial seed.  We believe that God will bless us because we commit the work of our hands to HIM.  so why do I wake up and worry about our business?  Covenant / tithe.  Can’t find them connected in my quick ‘bible study’.  I see that God tells me to “test him in this”.  I have, I will.  I see that the tithe is HOLY.  Hmmm.  Interesting. 

I get up to walk.  The trees are barren now.  No leaves left on the trees at the park.  They’ve given up the fight, they’ve let go of the dead leaves.  Waiting through the winter, waiting for the new life to bloom.

I’ve planted my seeds (finances).  Am I waiting through the winter to see the harvest?  The law of planting and reaping is true.  I’ve planted.  I will reap….in season.  How long does this financial winter last??

Help me Lord, I don’t want to worry.  I want to feel your hands under us, I want to see you holding us up.  I need to bolster my faith, move my shield from the fiery arrows of cancer and death to also protect me from the fear of famine.  You will provide.  Jehovah  Jireh – God our provider.  Still.

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