bad stuff

I have some anger and some unforgiveness in me right now that I want to spit all over this page. Then i may erase it. Or not.

There were some people at mom’s funeral that came out to show their love, show there compassion toward us, show us that they loved mom too. There were people that came to help us, to hold us up, to hug us, cry with us, laugh with us, remember her with us.
And then there were people who came to…disrespect us? Anger us? Abuse us?
Those were the people who smoked weed at my dad’s house the day after the funeral. Those were the people who disrespected my mom and dad AND our family. Funny…. these people were family.

I get that everyone grieves differently. I get that. I get that there were people drinking wine…I was drinking wine! But bringing drugs into his house, illegally…
Anyone who knows my family, and knows my dad KNOWS his absolute HATE of drugs. It seems like a slap in the face. It seems like a complete and total disregard for what we were going through, and a complete disrespect for us. It seems like something that is unforgivable. Is it? Will i forgive? I need to.

This is bad stuff. Embarrassing stuff. If you have an addiction, not my problem. If you bring your addiction to my dad’s house the day after my mom’s funeral….my problem. My pain. My hurt. My feelings.


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